I wasn’t gonna right this post until next week. Originally, I saw a video on Tik-Tok. Where a black man gloried being hit with by a belt when he was a kid. He called it discipline. Many other folks agreed. Because apparently since you didn’t end up in prison and a the psych ward everything is good and those whippings set you straight, right? I immediately thought of DMX and how his abusive childhood was one of the reasons he got addicted to drugs. In the song, “Slippin’”, DMX, speaks on his turbulent childhood. How his mother and her boyfriends would physically abuse him. How he started doing drugs in his early teens and found comfort in the stray dogs on the streets just to escape the abuse happening at home. This addiction that he was fighting ultimately lead to his death yesterday Friday, April 9th, 2021 at the age of 50.
There are many studies done by experienced child psychologists on. The topic of child abuse. These studies have shown that there is no connection between spankings and improved behavior. It doesn’t show children the severity in their actions but it does show them how to hide from their parents. It also shows kids that they should solve their problems with aggression or fight-or-flight response. Abuse gives children low-self esteem, thinking that they are the problem. 1/3 of addicts had experienced child abuse.
I know people dealing with or had dealt with drug-addiction that stemmed from childhood abuse. My uncle Cedric, became addicted to crack-cocaine when he came to the United States in the 1980’s, however his road to addiction started way before he came to America. My grandmother was known to be abusive to her children. She was a strict Pentecostal who use to wake up her children by whipping them on Sundays.
Even when I was a child and faced corporal punishment, it didn’t make me a good student in school. I was facing truancy problems, My grades never improved. I never even liked math or doing homework because my mother was frustrated over the fact that I was not understanding my assignments. Even some of the kids that I knew who are for corporal punishment because they went through it didn’t even turn out that great. Some, during their teens and early 20’s, who got in trouble with the law a lot. Many were of whom were the most disrespectful to the teachers.
It pains me as a young millennial, to see other millennials being pro-spanking children. We are supposed to do better than the previous generation. Yet here we are setting up the same system of punishment that didn’t do any of us good. Also, if you come across this article ask yourself, “how did spanking help me?”
And while asking this question, answer these as well:
- Did I go to my parents in looking for advice or didn’t talk to them because of fear that i may get hit?
- Do I flinch anytime someone raises their voice at me?
- Are you able to empathize or are emotionally inept?
- Are you a people pleaser?
- How many times have your parents preached against underaged drinking no marijuana but you participated in that?
Think about these questions before you speak on how “positive” corporal punishment is. We need to break this cycle of abuse!!